Being a parent of a teenager can be a tricky balancing act. You want to make sure your teen is comfortable speaking honestly and openly with you, but you also don’t want them to feel like they have too much freedom. The best way to find this balance is by spending quality time with your teenager on a regular basis. In order to be an effective parent and have a close, healthy relationship, you need to spend quality time with yourself and your teenager. Here are some reasons why it’s important to spend time with your teen and how it can benefit both of you.
Teens Need Guidance and Support
Spending quality time with your teenager gives them the opportunity to ask questions and talk about topics that may not come up in day-to-day conversations. Teens need guidance and support as they navigate their ever-changing lives, so it’s important for parents to be present and listen closely during these times. Knowing you are there to support them helps your child build the confidence to try new things and explore new ideas!2 Building a close relationship with your teen can help combat certain mental illnesses. According to the 2021 Cortland County Youth Survey, teens who enjoyed spending time with their moms were less likely to report depressive symptoms.1 This can help build trust between parent and child, essential for maintaining open communication throughout the teenage years.
Bonding Through Activities
Finding activities that you both enjoy is another great way to spend quality time with your teen. Whether it’s playing sports together, going for a walk around the neighborhood, or just watching movies at home, doing things together helps create a connection between parent and child that strengthens over time. It is a common assumption that teens don’t want to spend time with their parents, however, this has been shown to be false. In a recent study conducted by the Social Science Research Institute at Penn State, time spent between parents and teens actually increased during their early and middle adolescent years.3 Spending time with your teen also encourages them to take part in activities outside of their comfort zone, which in turn helps them figure out their identity and discover who they are! According to the 2021 youth survey in Cortland County, almost half of the students who reported that their parents do not give them lots of chances to do fun things with them report having depression.1 Having a lack of activities in their life can also lead your teen to partake in other activities to entertain themselves, such as drugs or alcohol. 18% of students who report their parents not giving them the chance for fun things together also reported using cannabis in the past 30 days.1
An Opportunity to Talk About Difficult Subjects
Although it can be intimidating for both parents and teens alike, talking about difficult subjects such as sex, drugs, alcohol or relationships is an important part of growing up. Having these conversations while spending quality time together provides an opportunity for teens to ask questions that they might not otherwise feel comfortable asking. It also gives parents the chance to give accurate advice without coming across as judgmental or overbearing – something teenagers often struggle with when talking directly with adults about sensitive subjects. Many teens report that not having a close bond with their parents to talk about topics like this lead to higher rates of alcohol and drug usage. According to the 2021 youth survey in Cortland County, out of those who reported not feeling close to their mother, 44% reported drinking alcohol and 27% reported using cannabis in their lifetime.1 Also, those who reported not feeling close to their parents were more likely to have used alcohol and other substances in the past 30 days.1 Having that bond and having those difficult conversations with your teen can help prevent drug and alcohol usage throughout their lifetime.
Overall, spending quality time with your teenager is essential for fostering an open dialogue between parent and child during this challenging stage of life. Not only does it give teens the guidance they need in order to make informed decisions about their future, but it also creates special bonding moments that will last long after the teenage years have passed! So take some time out of your busy schedule and make sure you’re carving out special moments each week just for your teenager – they will appreciate it now (and later!).
References:
- Cortland Area Communities That Care (CACTC). Results and Analysis: The 2022 Cortland County Youth Survey. https://www.cortlandareactc.org/publications. February,, 2023.
- Staying connected with pre-teens and teenagers. Raising Children Network. (2021, November 29). Retrieved February 16, 2023, from https://raisingchildren.net.au/pre-teens/communicating-relationships/family-relationships/staying-connected-you-your-teen
- Penn State News. (n.d.). Time with parents is important for teens’ well-being. Penn State University. Retrieved February 16, 2023, from https://www.psu.edu/news/research/story/time-parents-important-teens-well-being/
